Bar Mitzvah tips
“Let the boy choose the battel. He’s the one who’s going to use it every day, so he’s the one who has to like it.”
“Bar mitzvah boys grow fast. Don’t hem the suit pants until two weeks before — tops.”
“When I arranged the seating, I left a place for myself at every table. This way I was able to circulate among my guests and spend some time with all of them. It worked out really well.”
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In this article, contributors offer valuable tips for making your son's Bar Mitzvah a truly memorable and meaningful event. I transformed these contributions into a compelling feature that readers simply cannot miss!
“Do a dress rehearsal ten days before the simcha. Have every member of the family, including the parents, get dressed for the simcha from head to toe. This will give you the opportunity to see what’s missing or what needs to be fixed, with plenty of time to buy/find/mend what you still need.”
“Teach your kids in advance how to comport themselves at the simcha. Teach them how to greet their relatives — especially elderly relatives. They should know to smile, make eye contact and say, “Mazel tov! Thank you for coming,” and offer a handshake. They should also know how to respond to a bracha. This is especially important for the bar mitzvah boy, but the older kids on both sides of the mechitzah should be taught these skills as well.”
Pesach Fiascos…
A story of a newlywed couple in 1925.
The girl is utterly shocked to find her erliche husband prance in with a loaf of bread erev Pesach, unbeknownst to the custom of hiding 10 pieces of bread.
Oh! The sheer horror of discovering a Simchas Torah Pekel hidden deep in the linen closet… on Pesach.
Once again- a newly married girl. In her Shvigger’s house. Erev Pesach.
Not the best time to realize that your baby’s bottle is kitniyos
How to tell your non-frum relative that his Pesach present of whiskey is not so Pesach’dig after all?
A kallah pours an expensive bottle of whiskey, which was left behind by her Chosson, down the drain…
Limericks:
Wig sporting neither stripe nor curl
A once-upon flighty young girl
Many balls midair
Clown skills disappear
Worth exceeds a mountain of pearl
If they deny there are piles -- not true
They're in the same situation as you
It may be folded just fine
For a moment in time
Before the piles start sprouting anew
To my wedding how I counted down
To at last don that regal fur crown
But my pride grew smaller
As shtreimlach grew taller
And mine is now the flattest in town
To my wedding how I counted down
To at last don that regal fur crown
But my pride grew smaller
As shtreimlach grew taller
And mine is now the flattest in town
You matched up the sock to the shoe,
The hair bow and yarmulke too,
They wore it - you blinked,
You washed it - it shrinked,
And now there's more shopping to do.